ReviewStack: McAllister's Mates Seventeen
Hi all
Two great pieces - one from a dear friend returning to Substack after a break, and another from a great writer who I’ve just discovered.
These reviews are part of Reviewstack run by the great writer and pillar of the Substack Community :
An ongoing series of reviews of some of the wonderful articles, poems, and stories I’ve discovered on Substack (and other places) and more importantly the beautiful souls behind the works.
Please take a few moments to read the works of these authors and if you find their work as life-affirming and life changing as I do, then please let them know. We need to support and cherish these voices.
You can meet some of my other friends in the previous instalments: 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
If you want to keep me in caffeine (and keep the ghostly voices whispering for the poetry side of things) - consider clicking below. For any who do so, you have my deepest gratitude.
This poem charts a personal and beautiful moment in CJ's life through the lens of summer’s end. Rather than portraying the coming autumn as a time of melancholy (as is so often done by other writers), CJ creates an air of expectation. The poem invokes both beautiful images of the physical harvest and also a feeling of a coming dream. The dream-like atmosphere is sustained with references to fragments of oaths collected in verse and the “hill folk” returning to a barely remembered place - what is happening has happened before but the minute details seem lost in thick emotions and a faded collage of memories.
There is a slow but clear pulse to the imagery and cadence. It puts me in mind of the feeling of gently falling when about to enter sleep or a trance state. This is a sanctuary of warmth and safety, but something is coming. Something beautiful but also a volatile disruptive force much like a coming dreamscape. There is some lovely sound-work and cadence in the lines of the first verse - “ribbons of rain” and “poitín out of potatoes”. Touches like this help sustain the smooth and slow atmosphere, but again moving with a definite purpose.
The second verse takes a more direct approach - we’re switched from a harmonious panoramic view of the landscape to a tight character driven drama. The language takes on a greater urgency. One of my favourite lines “heavy with the weight of breath” crystallises the movement from the ethereal to the physical. The wispy, perhaps angelic presence of the first verse becomes real. A build up of atmospheric (or astral?) pressure is released in “coastal lightning” - another brilliant metaphor for colliding worlds. The mysterious, moody sea and the solid earth with heavenly fire crossing the two.
In the final stretch the poem becomes warm, gentle, and secure. The long wait is over and the new life is welcomed. Again we see the use of some beautiful, melodic alliteration: “the drumlins will be draped with blankets;”. This brings the poem full circle moving back to the gentle pulsing rhythm of the first verse, after the dramatic weight of the previous lines. However, the previous underlying agitation and impatience is replaced with an air of contentment and joy. This is a brilliant piece of work with great attention to detail, creating rhythms that marry perfectly to the sentiments of each line: expectancy, agitation, high drama and finally serenity. This is one of CJ’s finest works, but also a progression and change to his usual style. I’m excited to see where he goes next.
Joe is a new writer that has wandered into my awareness and I can say I'm delighted to meet him. I hate the old adage “show don't tell” - to an extent I get the point but it's wielded like a blunt instrument. Joe, however, is a master of the middle ground - metaphor. The scene opens on a couple in a strained relationship having dinner, but rather than bombard us with backstory or immediately relay stilted dialogue we get a beautiful description of two joined candles. Unlit, joined at the wick and lifeless. United companions perhaps, but denied their purpose. Yet if a fire broke their bond it would bring them both to glory and they'd achieve their full potential. The imagery is ingenious and a great opening that immediately gives this story uniqueness. The image is further solidified and sharpened by a comment that Sloan's gold jewellery should have gleamed in the would-be candlelight, but was instead barely touched by the dull overhead light. Masterful.
Of course stilted dialogue very much has a place in a story like this. After setting the scene so beautifully, the story invites us into the conversation. The pacing is perfectly realised with short, spiky, cool snippets of conversation broken up by longer passages describing the character's thoughts and backstories.
Sloan's story is poignant, her previous relationship with something of a hypocritical brute is told vividly and sympathetically. However, at no point is she turned into a victim. An intelligent, driven, and passionate woman who (understandably) has gone down the road of a safe, reliable partner who while loyal can never truly understand her.
Louis is an introvert still processing a bereavement. From Sloan's perspective he may seem emotionally distant and sensitive, however Joe paints a picture of an intelligent, imaginative man. One who may sometimes be at a loss for words through shyness or fear of his own deep-seated emotions, but a good man.
The greatest tragedy of their relationship may be that they fail to see each other’s past trauma. Perhaps they do not wish to burden each other with sadness, perhaps these events are just too painful to talk about. But, if anything could relight their passion and affection for each other, it would be opening that vulnerability, to let the other see their past trauma and let them offer healing. Reading this piece, part of me was screaming at Louis TELL HER ABOUT YOUR FATHER!! That is the power of good writing, like the Never Ending Story’s Sebastian, we are no longer watching the literary world, we are there. The story ends with a dramatic event that maybe, just maybe might really make them talk. What comes next?
Joe is an exciting voice on Substack - poetic, and with a keen insight to real relationships beyond shallow idealised romantic gauze. I’ll be keeping a keen eye on him - I encourage you to do the same.
I hope you enjoy these beautiful works as much as I enjoyed reading them and writing about them.
You can meet some of my other friends in the previous instalments: 16 15 14 13 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
Substack has proven to be a treasure trove and I already have a few more gifted writers lined up for my next review newsletter.
Thanks Graeme, this was a nice surprise, I really appreciated the review. There are a lot more stories on my substack and a new one coming out every week this year.